1. Limits must be tested. A Kingsman only condones the risking of a life to save another.
2. I had such high hopes for you.You are a bloody disgrace.
3. Teamwork is paramount here at Kingsman.
4. Anybody willing to donate that much deserves a private dinner.
5. But nothing beats two cheeseburgers with secret sauce.
6. What a shame we both had to grow up.
7. I just had to come over and say “Amazing eyes”. You wearing color contacts?
8. A word of advice: Ascot requires top hat.
9. Sometimes a culling is the only way to ensure that this species survives.
10. What the fuck is this?
11. A bespoke suit always fits.
12. I just want to remind you that today is a day of celebration.
Eggsy: “To pee or not to pee?”
Harry: That was the headline the day after I diffused a dirty bomb in Paris.
Eggsy: “Germany 1 – England 5.”
Harry: I missed that game. I was breaking up an undercover spy ring at Pentagon. My first mission. I foiled the assassination of Margaret Thatcher.
Eggsy: Not everybody had thanked you for that one.
Harry: The point is, Eggsy, nobody thanked me for any of them. Front page news, and all these occasions were celebrity nonsense. Because it is the nature of Kingsman that our acheivements remain secret. A gentleman’s name should appear in the newspaper only three times: When he’s born, when he marries and when he dies. And we are, first and foremost, gentlemen.
Eggsy: Pretty fucked then. Its like Charlie said, I am just a pleb.
Harry: Nonsense. Being a gentleman has nothing to do with the circumstances of one’s birth. Being a gentleman is something one learns.
Eggsy: Yeah, but how?
Harry: Alright, first lesson, you should have asked me before you took a seat. Second lesson, how to make a proper martini.
Eggsy: Yes, Harry.
Valentine: God damn it. It fucking hurts.
Gazelle: You are the one who asked for a biometric security system. What’s wrong with a simple switch?
Valentine: A simple switch?This is an extremely dangerous machine. It should only be operated by someone responsible and sane as me. Bad shit can happen if it falls into the wrong hands. Are we done here? Shit.
Gazelle: No, now this one, for the test of the church.
Valentine: This one just has a short range. A simple switch will do.
Eggsy: So you gonna teach me how to talk proper like in ‘My Fair Lady’?
Harry: That’d be absurd. Being a gentleman has nothing to do with one’s accent. Its about being at ease in one’s own skin. As Hemingway said:”There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man.” “True nobility is being superior to your former self.” Now, the first thing every gentleman needs is a good suit. By which I mean a bespoke suit. Never off the peg. And Kingsman suits are always bulletproof,So let’s get you measured. And whether you get the job or not, you will have a lasting and useful memento of your time at Kingsman.
Waiter: I’m so sorry, sir, but a gentleman is completing his fitting. Fitting Room 2 is available.
Harry: One does not use Fitting room 2 when one is popping one’s cherry. Perhaps I’ll show you Fitting Room 3, while we wait.
Eggsy: So we going up or down?
Eggsy: Is this it?
Harry: Of course not. Pull the hook on your left.
Eggsy: Ah yes…Very very nice.
Harry: You’re going to need a pair of shoes to go with your suit. An Oxford is any formal shoes, with open lacing. This additional decorative piece is called broguing. “Oxford’s, not brogue’s.” Words to live by, Eggsy. Words to live by. Try a pair. Your weapon scores are excellent, by the way. These you’re familiar with. And this is our standard issue pistol. Its quite unique. As you all see it, it also fires a shotgun cartridge for use in messy close-range situations. How do they feel? Now do your very best in personation of a German aristocrat’s formal greeting. No, Eggsy.
Eggsy: That is sick.
Harry: In the old days, they had a phone in the heel as well.
Eggsy: How do I get it back in?
Harry: It is coated with one of the fastest-acting neurotoxins known to man, so very carefully.
Eggsy: I had a lot of fun with this.
Harry: One of our finest examples of chemical engineering. Poison. Harmless when ingested. But at a time, convenient to you…it can be remotely activated. Primed. Lethal.
Eggsy: And what about these? What do these do? Electrocute you?
Harry: Don’t be ridiculous. It’s a hand grenade.
Eggsy: Shut up…
Harry: If you want to electrocute someone, you’ll need a signet ring. A gentleman traditionally wears the signet on his left hand, but a Kingsman wears it on whatever hand happens to be dominant. If you touch the contact behind the ring, it delivers 50,000 volts.
Eggsy: And what about them? What makes them so special?
Harry: Nothing. That technology is caught up with the spy world. Put it back, Eggsy.
Waiter: Perfect timing. Gentleman’s just finished.